October came and went and no baby. November 1, 2, 3...all the way through the 6th passed and still no baby. He finally made his grand entrance early in the morning of the 8th. I remember sitting in the hospital room the day we brought him home, exhausted, elated, weepy, excited and scared. I looked out our window and it was a picture perfect Autumn day - blustery, an odd warmth, spats of rain and leaves fluttering everywhere. That gave me a sense of calm, of knowing that my whole world may have just changed, but THE world didn't change.
Fast forward to a week later. We had one ravenous little boy on our hands and breastfeeding was far from a walk in the park. I had the baby blues big time and was in a fog. My mom was here and did a fabulous job of making sure I got outside in the sunshine every day. I'm so glad she did. We have a silver maple in our backyard, and it's always one of the last trees to turn. 2 years ago, it's like it was waiting for Graham; On Graham's one week birthday, (the 15th of November) our silver maple was in its full glory, brilliantly yellow and breathtaking.
We took a picture in front of that tree, and it's one of my favorites. You can see just how tired we are, and just how small Graham is. But you can also see hope. We had no idea how much harder the few months ahead would be, learning about a baby and severe allergies and reflux, about how a hair dryer running for 3 hours straight may be the only thing to get the screaming to stop, about how sometimes, we may need more help than we can give ourselves. What we also didn't know was the joy, the excitement and the complete and total new way of life that we would experience,;one full of firsts, of seeing the world through new eyes, of learning that fast isn't best and family is everything. Of learning to re-prioritize, to say yes to less so we could say yes to the things that really mattered. And of days full of giggles and smiles (sometimes tantrums and whining), of trains and books and tickle fights.
That yellow tree has waited for Graham's birth week the past two years; this week it's at its peak. I just stand in our dining room staring at it with a smile on my face some days. Knowing that we don't always know what lies ahead, but that our God is good, and He has plans for us we could never have dreamed if we tried. Plans that may include hard things, but plans that will bring so, so much joy.
Happy Birthday week Graham! You are treasured and loved. And now you're waking up, so I have to go. :)
